I take lessons from “Putin’s Playbook”. Two Salty Dogs will ruthlessly invade Waldoboro unless everyone on my newsletter list turns in all their monthly disposable income, pocket change, John McClane, and all Nakatomi Corporation bearer bonds.

I’m serious this time.

Either way, buy some stuff here this month, so it’s worth continuing to create original, if not misleading, content. I swear if you don’t buy a lot of stuff this month, I’m just going to copy and paste some stuff from old weightlifting magazines from the 80s.

Let’s face it. Sometimes we need a dog leash to perform other tasks like restraining a burglar, tying up a boat, or towing an out of fuel or otherwise disabled Russian fighter piece from your sorghum crop with your tractor.

These rope leashes are the ones that get the job done. And yes. it includes the famous “Weiss Walkie”. I told you… ROPE LEASHES! So don’t be a jackball and give my shop reviews that say I’m really cheap. Instead write reviews I’m really dumb because I insert long photos of products in the newsletter that I have to write until I get to the bottom of the photo.

Hey! Do you remember the newsletter I put The Sham Wow guy on all the products?

It was awesome. Click here if you think that was great.

Ah. The end of the picture.

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